Top Funny Quotes
I'm 42 and the age of a guy who has kids, so I guess I'm playing right where I'm supposed to be. I'm comfortable with that, but in the same breath I'd do something edgy. If someone came to me and offered me an edgy and funny story, then I'd do it.
Eddie Murphy
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
Peter Ustinov
Sometimes people get mad at The Simpsons' subversive story telling, but there's another message in there, which is a celebration of making wild, funny stories.
Matt Groening
Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call fine print
Pickup Lines
People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
Ellen DeGeneres
Paula Danziger 
Neve Campbell 
Ben Stiller 
Jerry Lawler 
Rachel Dratch 
Thomas Haden Church 
Amy Poehler 
Neil Innes All Funny Quotes
I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.
Dane Cook 
68% of people like this quote
The thing I thought about doing it was it's Comic Relief and you've got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can't sing.
Jo Brand
68% of people like this quote
God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.
Garrison Keillor
65% of people like this quote
If you work at comedy too laboriously, you can kill what's funny in the joke.
Richard Russo
64% of people like this quote
It's funny, we all really, really got along. I don't know how it was in years past but this year, I was really with a good group of people. No one tried to sabotage each other or steal the other ones moments.
LaToya London
64% of people like this quote
Carol Burnett was particularly funny. She swore for the first time on television on Larry Sanders.
Garry Shandling
63% of people like this quote
For years I used to bore my wife over lunch with stories about funny incidents.
James Herriot
63% of people like this quote
Popular Funny Authors
George Bernard ShawGilbert K. ChestertonDoug CouplandWill RogersGeorge OrwellGertrude SteinRobert FrostW. Somerset MaughamErnest HemingwayMae WestWoody AllenAdlai E. StevensonJim CarreyLenny KravitzHedy Lamarr
Susan SontagMitch HedbergPickup LinesMargaret ThatcherOrlando BloomMaya LinDavid OgilvyCraig BruceParis HiltonJimi HendrixTheodore BikelTodd BarryCasey StengelTahar Ben JellounBill Cosby
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