Top Funeral Quotes
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Mark Twain
I wanted to make a human monster. His name is Coffin Baby. The idea is based on a group of people from Pasadena whose names I can't mention. His mother died and during the funeral, this baby came out of her in the coffin.
Tobe Hooper
When I die, I'll probably climb out of the coffin and play the organ at my own funeral!
Rick Wakeman
When elected officials abandon our environment and ruin our natural resources, public health is endangered. I know the importance of providing a clean environment for our children; I have attended more than one funeral for a child who has died from an asthma attack.
Gwen Moore
Laura Bush went on national television during the week of my father's funeral and spoke out against embryonic stem cell research, pointing out that where Alzheimer's is concerned, we don't have proof that stem-cell treatment would be effective.
Patti Davis
Simon Hoggart 
Gavin MacLeod 
Samuel Goldwyn 
Rick Wakeman 
Rosalind Russell 
Walt Whitman 
Erma Bombeck All Funeral Quotes
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Mark Twain 
71% of people like this quote
I wanted to make a human monster. His name is Coffin Baby. The idea is based on a group of people from Pasadena whose names I can't mention. His mother died and during the funeral, this baby came out of her in the coffin.
Tobe Hooper
62% of people like this quote
When I die, I'll probably climb out of the coffin and play the organ at my own funeral!
Rick Wakeman
61% of people like this quote
When elected officials abandon our environment and ruin our natural resources, public health is endangered. I know the importance of providing a clean environment for our children; I have attended more than one funeral for a child who has died from an asthma attack.
Gwen Moore
59% of people like this quote
Laura Bush went on national television during the week of my father's funeral and spoke out against embryonic stem cell research, pointing out that where Alzheimer's is concerned, we don't have proof that stem-cell treatment would be effective.
Patti Davis
59% of people like this quote
If anyone at my funeral has a long face, I'll never speak to him again.
Stan Laurel
57% of people like this quote
The formal Washington dinner party has all the spontaneity of a Japanese imperial funeral.
Simon Hoggart
57% of people like this quote
The big debate right now is if Saddam is alive or dead. He's dead, then he's alive, then dead, then alive. It's just confusing. Today they showed videotape, and Saddam was speaking at his own funeral.
David Letterman
56% of people like this quote
As soon as people see my face on a movie screen, they knew two things: first, I'm not going to get the girl, and second, I'll get a cheap funeral before the picture is over.
Lee Marvin
56% of people like this quote
Anything awful makes me laugh. I misbehaved once at a funeral.
Charles Lamb
56% of people like this quote
Popular Funeral Authors
Francois de La RochefoucauldMark TwainGeorge EliotHenry Ward BeecherDavid Herbert LawrenceSteven WrightWalt WhitmanErma BombeckJames Russell LowellT. S. EliotSamuel GoldwynAnne RiceChuck PalahniukCharles LambDavid Letterman
Natalie PortmanJames LarkinJohn BurroughsJudi DenchMark RobertsJerome K. JeromeHarold BrodkeyGavin MacLeodSteve BuyerFrank McCourtRick WakemanGeorge AdeJimmy BreslinPaul SamuelsonTobe Hooper
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