“They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what they decided? I need glasses.”
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I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin.
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Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people.
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I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.
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Show me a man with very little money and I will show you a bum.
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