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Random Comedian Quotes

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast.

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In the Halls of Justice the only justice is in the halls.

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One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.

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If somebody pisses me off and I understand it ain't personal then I'll go to another place and I'll meditate.

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I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.

Rita Rudner

Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories?

Emo Philips

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Paula Poundstone

Paula Poundstone

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